July 25, 2013

Dream House, as described to me by Eva on Sunday evening and tonight before bed

The Living Room

  • The remote control is hot pink and black, as is the TV.
  • There is a picture of Hello Kitty on the wall. (She looks good with hot pink and black.)
  • If you dance a certain secret way in front of the TV, a passage opens to the cave lab. (This is one of many secret openings to the cave lab throughout the house and grounds.)
  • The doors of this passage to the cave lab will allow Eva through but will close and smash any bad guy who attempts to enter.
  • After entering this passage, Eva, family members, and trusted friends must cross a bridge to an elevator. Once on the elevator they must enter the secret code, 2323, and the elevator will take them down into the cave. (Do not repeat the secret code.)

The Dining Room

  • The dining room table is made of diamonds.
  • Do you really need to know any more about the dining room?

The Office

  • The office is very organized.
  • It has many boxes in which Eva keeps the records of her My-Spies (security cameras that peep down from the ceiling).
  • Her My-Spies are named McKenna, Amy, and Grapefruit.
  • McKenna looks for weapons in the house that do not belong to Eva.
  • Amy looks for bombs brought in by bad guys.
  • Grapefruit looks for people.
  • Grapefruit is the best My-Spy.
  • Behind the couch in the office is a button that opens Eva’s secret cabinet of weapons.
  • The button is hot pink and black.

The Bedroom

  • The bedroom is decorated entirely in hot pink and black, with the exception of the numerous stacks–reaching almost to the ceiling–of many kinds of precious gems that tower about the room.

The Playground

  • There is a jungle gym and a pool.
  • If you cross the monkey bars in a certain secret obstacle course pattern (and avoid the laser beams), another passage to the cave lab will open. You must maneuver so that you will enter head first.
  • If Eva slides head first down the slide that goes into the pool, another secret door will open underwater and let her dive into the cave lab. If anyone else slides down the slide into the pool, nothing exciting happens (except the usual splash).

The Cave Lab

  • There are three machines in the cave lab.
  • One is a food machine, which is why the house has no kitchen.
  • One is a clothes machine that allows you to make a new outfit every day.
  • The last is a time machine.
  • All of the machines are hot pink and black.

The Ninjas

  • Ninjas live hidden in the house, ready and waiting should the family ever need them. (A rare event, since Eva is, of course, an excellent defender.)
  • The ninjas wear hot pink and black. (Eva did not specify this detail, but at this point, I feel safe in assuming.)

I am left wondering what the bathroom must be like.